In Asia, where I'm from, the majority of people here still rely on their parents. Even when they are in their thirties, some still live with their parents and drive their parents' cars in exchange for their independence. The parents love this because it allows them to take care of and protect their kids. This is understandable from the parents' perspective, but what you may not realize is that by trading your independent life for comfort, you have also traded your dreams and the potential to become the person you've always wanted to be.
You may argue that you are independent, but are you really? Imagine your life without your parents and their legacy. Can you survive? Can you continue the life you are living right now? If your answer is no, then you will find this post extremely useful. I have listed 3 simple ways for you to gain independence and learn how to be self-reliant.
Stop relying on your parent's legacy
If you are still relying on your parents, then I fear that you may have wasted part of your life trading the potential to leave a mark of your own for a comfort that doesn't last.
The time between when you leave your parents' house and when you have kids is the only time you really have to yourself.
The quote above is very true. The more you cling on to this, the less time you will have for yourself.
How to change: You must step up and tell your parents that you have to find a place of your own and you no longer need their support. They have helped you long enough (20+ years!), and it's time for you to grow up and face the world by yourself. Get an apartment and a job, experiment with your life, learn from the failures, and eventually, you will find who you really are.
Question the Norm
Have you ever asked yourself why you have to work in a big organization, out of college like everyone else? Is it for security? In this economy? I doubt there are any left. You will not be truly independent if the decision you live by wasn't made by you. To give you an example, most people never thought of picking their own beliefs. They are most likely to cling onto whatever their parents' beliefs are without ever exploring the choices they have. I think this is a lost opportunity since you will never have the answer to what exactly you really believe in.
How to change: First, you have to realize that there are always choices other than the ones that are presented in front of you, and it is not a crime to expand your choices. It is your life after all, and no one can control it but you. Once you realize that, start questioning each choice and compare them to find the best one that fits you most. For example, out of college, you can work in a big organization like everyone else for perks and deluded security, or you can work in a startup so that you can learn all the processes and eventually start your own business. Decide which one aligns better with your life goals and go for it.
Go and Travel Alone
Nothing teaches you self-reliance better than traveling alone to other countries. If you have never done it, then you have never actually experienced life itself. Traveling alone helps you break out of your little bubble and allows you to experience the world in its authentic way. You will learn to rely on yourself, become more confident, and the world will be your oyster.
How to change: If you want to do it, do it now. Not next month or next year. Now. Buy a flight and leave. Otherwise, you will continue to procrastinate, and the plan will never come into fruition. This happened to me in the first half of 2013. In 2012, I said to myself that I would travel the world. I procrastinated until I had enough of it, and I decided to do it right away. I booked a flight on that same day to prevent myself from backing out and went through with it. Best decision I have ever made.
Also, to ease this process, start slowly. Pick a nearby destination so that you will not get overwhelmed by the costs and planning, and start from there.
As kids, most of us looked forward to becoming adults so that we could do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. The possibilities seemed endless. However, as we grew older, our responsibilities and commitments also grew, and we started to realize that this was not the case. We began blaming our naivety for believing in such nonsense and dismissed the idea altogether.
I have been independent and self-reliant for a while now, and I've got to say, this is the adulthood I've been looking for, and I believe that this may also be what you are looking for.
Further Reading for Inspiration
Looking for more articles to help inspire you to travel more? Here are a collection of articles you might like:
- Hiking to the Everest Base Camp is one of the most memorable epic moments of my life. Here's a long-read piece about my experiences hiking the Everest Base Camp: On My Way To Everest Base Camp.
- Ever wondered what it's like to travel the world on a third-world passport? Check out: Traveling The World On A Third World Passport.
- Here's why I always celebrate turning a year older with a hike: Climbing Kilimanjaro On My 33rd Birthday.
- Are you currently planning a trip around the world and looking for cheap countries to visit? Here are the 13 Cheapest Countries To Visit in the World.
- Traveling in Europe can be cheap, really cheap. These are the 12 Cheap European Countries to Visit.
- Looking for the most beautiful travel blogs to follow? Here are the 24 Most Beautiful Travel Blogs to Follow.
- For adventurers and backpackers out there, here are the 10 Best Adventure and Backpacking Blogs You Should Follow.
- I truly believe we need more Asian representatives in the English-speaking travel blogging industry, especially for blogs about Asia. Here are the Top 10 Kick-Ass Asian Travel Bloggers To Follow.
- Did you know that you can travel without leaving your couch? Here are the 8 Great Travel Books You Should Read.
- For the best travel videos to inspire you to travel even further, here are the 20 Most Creative Travel Videos of All Time.
- If you are looking for travel vloggers to follow on YouTube that aren't cringeworthy, check out: 10 Best Travel Vloggers to Follow On YouTube.
- The best way to improve your photography skills is to learn from the best. Here are the 10 Best Photography YouTube Channels to Follow.
- A photo is worth a thousand words. Here are the 25 Most Beautiful Travel Photos I Ever Took From Around The World.
- Ever wondered what it is like to be a travel blogger during COVID-19? Check out: Being A Travel Blogger During COVID-19 - What Is It Like?
- Looking for off-the-beaten-path destinations to visit this year? Check out: 8 Best Off-The-Beaten-Path Destination to Visit.
- Can't travel internationally for the time being? How about traveling in your own country? Here are the 7 Reasons Why You Should Travel in Your Own Country.
- To find the most inspirational travel quotes and captions to go with your photos on Instagram, check out 34 Short and Unique Traveller Quotes for Instagram.
- We often hear bad stories about locals from travelers, but what about the other way around? Here are some of the Notorious Stories Of Terrible Backpackers.
- If you lost your bag while you travel, here is how to deal with the situation: My Bag Was Stolen In Germany.
- Have you ever felt that you do not belong in the place you were born in? Read this: Where Is Home? - My Quest In Search Of Where I Belong.
- People often preach about how important it is to live in the moment, but sometimes, that may not be such a good idea. Here is The Problem With Living In The Moment.
- Solo traveling is not for everyone, and even though I love it to death, it is not always flowers and sunshine for solo travelers. Here are the 10 Things I Hate Most When Traveling Solo.
- Travel friends come and go, but that may not be such a bad thing. Here is why you should embrace your travel friends: A Life Of Brief Encounters.
- Hiking is life. Here's why: One Year Of Incredible Discomfort - 10 Things I've Learned From Climbing Mountains.
- Here's why having no plan is the best plan: Magical Things Happen When You Have Nothing To Do - The Art Of Doing Nothing.
- Is life getting you down? Here's why you can't always blame life for everything: Life Doesn't Suck. We Just Suck At Living It.
- Want to know why I chose to travel alone? Read this: We Travel Alone, NOT To Be Alone.
- For a meaningful solo trip, you need to share it with someone. Here is why Happiness Is Only Real When Shared.
- Traveling is no longer for the rich. Here is why: "People Think I'm Rich".
- The Himalayan Mountain is one hell of a teacher. Here are the 7 Life Lessons The Himalayas Taught Me.
- Want to travel alone but scared that you might get bored out of your mind? Here is How to Enjoy Yourself and Have Fun While Traveling Alone.
- Want to start traveling solo, too? Here is What It's Like to Travel Alone.
- Here is a simple story on how I started traveling: F*ck It, I'll Do This Alone.
- For more inspiring articles like this, visit my Inspiration page.
Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links.
2 Comments
Wonderful post.Thanks. I still depend on my parents. I hope until the end of the year to be independent and self resilience, first in my country, living short time in different cities and later on abroad.
Hey Renate,
Thank you for the comments! :) That's a good time to look forward to when you are finally independent. You can do whatever you want, live the life however you like, create a name for yourself, of course, given you have savings to do so or have a way of earning while abroad. :)
Glad you like the article!